the respite

so, my gorgeous husband stretched out on sofa like the
handsome cat he is, raises his arms above his head for an extra inch of air--ah!
and we talk--easy--
settling into a little normal rhythm before the next storm.

i'm still recovering from flu and am cozy in pajamas
not breathing in his heavily maitake mushroomed vicinity
and we just talk- like normal people
after dinner, dishes in the sink, cat meowing and dog in a dream.

so, he's all healed from the biopsy
he is well now, energy full-ish
working every day
reveling in all the laudatory tributes from pals far and near and i say
"so , what do you want to do now? the next year, if we get it," i say
"what shall we do".
so he says," friends. that's what we do.
like the day we first got the diagnosis and
we were walking on wilshire blvd dazed and thinking about death.
that's when i got it
i can't go walking around thinking about death,. all these guys on the street, they're not thinking about death,
they're living their lives. so that's what we're gonna do.
i'm going to go to
work and eat great food and lots of ice cream and to as many gatherings as i possibly can.
no dreamy weekends isolating in the woods ( he looks at me, the isolate, desperate for silence and solitude--okay okay)-- no weekends on lonely islands or quiet walks in ojai. nope, i want to be with friends and see my life."

so, it's the quiet now before the next bump.
we are stretching like lazy cats and waiting for the next thing but
for now. we are here and there and everywhere,.
gospel at the temple tomorrow, football on sunday
saturday is open if anyone wants to play(!)
so is monday
i'm exhausted and cranky and he's having a great time
what else is new?

tuesday we see the big fancy surgical oncologist, the maven in this disease
and then we make the decision to get to that chemo or this
and see how that goes

meantime, how are you doing?
life is good.
feel free to e tony at sofisdad@pacbell.net or give him a call-- office best 310 855 0100 x564
xxoo
s