Speaking of endings...

friend jeanette asked for a little one act
for her MOTEL CHRONICLES project.
two people, one room
lay aside projections-- a piece about abandonment, fierceness,
endings and what it takes to get something finished

not sure if the formatting will hold
this part of the Marriage Suite


SMOKE GETS IN YOUR EYES
By Susan Merson

BILLY, 40’s, IS SITTING ON THE MOTEL BED POURING HOT WATER FROM A THERMOS INTO A CUP O NOODLES. SHE WORKS CAREFULLY, LOOKING FOR A PLACE TO PUT IT DOWN SO SHE CAN MAKE THE NEXT CUP. HER HUSBAND, CARL, IS WITH HER, PACING, CHECKING HIS PHONE.

BILLY
I was talking on the telephone. I mean I was on hold, on the freeway. I was looking for you. I was holding the phone…

CARL
When? (HE POKES AT THE PASTA WITH A FORK)… that looks pretty nasty.. Bring any parmesan?
BILLY
I didn’t bring the contents of the pantry when I beat it from the fire, okay? (she waves him away) When I was driving here from home, alone. I was driving and..
CARL
… when, on your way here? In all that traffic. You were driving and talking on the phone? (SHE GIVES HIM A LOOK) You’re telling me some story about talking on the.. . and you’re cooking Cup O Noodles. I’m listening for Chrissakes..
BILLY
Multi tasking. That’s what we do. I am “cooking” your pasta and telling you a story at the same time.



CARL
Well, do one thing or the other, will ya?

BILLY
I am cooking and talking, Women, we multitask. We talk and eat. Fuck and dream of Fellini.
CARL
I bet HE got to eat the pasta his wife made lovingly in his own home. Not in some crap ass motel on a freeway overpass. I really need to eat. I am so fucking hungry.

BILLY
Doing the best I can here…

CARL
Right, you’ve had a tough day.

BILLY
And your day? How was your day, asshole? Mine was a picture of contentment.

CARL
I told you. I’m hungry. Hell of a day. The kind of bullshit I put up with, man…

BILLY
Yeah? What kind of bullshit? You make your way through roadblocks, get the last rental car on the lot because your car is a smoking mass in our carport halfway to Mulholland?

CARL
I’m glad you got a rental car.

BILLY
I am trying to tell you something..
CARL
Well, tell me already, goddamnit. And Christ, don’t drown the goddamn Cup O Noodles. How can you even pretend that I am going to eat that crap?

BILLY
Don’t.
CARL
What?
BILLY
Don’t eat it. I don’t see the pantry overflowing. Unless you’d like to go stand in the line at the shelter. I bet they’re serving filet fucking mignon.

CARL
I am just saying…

BILLY (quietly firm)
Carl, find a table and then goddamn set it. Turn on the radio. See if there;s a report on the fire zone, If all the houses in our area went up.

CARL
Calm down . I’ll set the table.
HE MOVES THE END TABLE BETWEEN THEM. PLACES THE TWO CANISTERS OF FOOD ON THE TABLE. FINDS PLASTIC FORKS THEN, RELENTING-- FLIPS ON THE RADIO. JAZZ PLAYS. IT HELPS.



BILLY
Sit down. Here. You’re hungry. Here, it’s ready. There are two--

HE JUMPS UP
CARL
Right, I’ll be right there. I gotta pee. Three seconds…

BILLY SITS DOWN AT THE TABLE ALONE. SHE CAN’T LIFT HER FORK. SHE IS EXHAUSTED. THE MUSIC PLAYS. SHE PLACES HER TWO HANDS ON THE TABLE IN FRONT OF HER.SHE SPEAKS TO NO ONE. TAKES A DEEP BREATH.

BILLY
Just as I came onto the ramp. I saw him and I rolled to a stop. On the freeway. Remember how we looked at those elk we saw on the side of the road, braying at each other in the fog. That time in Northern California? We just stopped and…

CARL COMES BACK IN. HE HAS ONLY HEARD THE PART ABOUT THE CAR.

CARL
What.. on the freeway? What were you driving? You got the last rental car on Ventura. Lucky. What are you driving?
HIS CELL PHONE RINGS

BILLY
A Nissan Sentra.. Triple AA discount.
HE ANSWERS IT.

CARL
( speaks into the phone) Yeah? Carl. Jimmy! I’m eating dinner. I’m at the goddamn table with my…
HE GETS UP AND MOTIONS TO BILLY. HE HAS TO TAKE IT

BILLY
….. and there was one of those relic-y VW’s, a rattly snack van loaded for bear, on the way to sell crap to some gathering at some kid soccer game.

CARL(on phone)
Aw fuck, Jim. You call me with this crap? I told you what I need. We got burnt out. Our whole street. Everything gone.. everything up for grabs.. I been standing in lines all day long….
CARL TAKES HIS PHONE AND LEAVES AGAIN. BILLY IS ALONE. SHE SPEAKS TO THE AIR.

BILLY
It looked like he was looking for a contact lens or something. He didn’t get up.. He had nothing on. No clothes. He had managed to walk to the middle of the freeway, just after the 101 merges into the 170 and all those trucks are on their way from the warehouses down near the interchange. And everyone is trying to drive away from the hills. and he was on his hands and knees on the freeway, his balls blowing in the wind. Looking for something. His knees were bleeding…you could see that as he moved along. Making imprints on the concrete. It took the longest time. for anyone to believe that the guy was even there. He didn’t move except on his knees an inch at a time. He was on the way to Campostela.
CARL COMES BACK IN


CARL
That was Jim.

BILLY
What did he want?
CARL
He wanted to fuck me up the ass. That’s what he wanted..
BILLY
Tasty language.
CARL
All of a sudden you’re so sensitive. Mac fucking truck driver potty mouth finds God, I suppose.
THEY EAT THE MUSIC HELPS. FORKS. GLASSES CLINK, SLURP. EACH EATING, AVOIDING, EATING.

BILLY
Hard day.
CARL
You bet.
BILLY
I’m not apologizing. You stormed out of the house. No conversation.
CARL
We had a fight, Billy. We always have fights.
BILLY
Carl. How long we been married?
CARL
Twenty years.
BILLY
Sometimes I feel like the guy on the freeway.


CARL
What guy?
BILLY
The guy I was telling you about, when you were on the phone not listening, The naked guy, on his hands and knees looking for something on the freeway .. the way he looked so hard.. everyone was watching him look—It was scary.

SHE CLOSES HER EYES
CARL
Bil? ( no answer) Bil? Your eyes are closed but I know you’re not sleeping. (no answer)
Bil. I took the car in. Last week. I took the car in and the guy told me it needed a new engine. The tires were shot. Transmission leaking. Bil. We needed a new car. A new engine. The one that burned, it was done anyway.
BILLY
Where’d you go? After the fight?
CARL
You bring any of my stuff? My bag? Wallet.
BILLY
You stormed out of the house, Walked somewhere. And yes, I brought all your stuff. It’s there on the dresser.
HE GOES AND CHECKS OUT HIS ID AND STUFF. SHE WATCHES HIM DO INVENTORY.
Where’d you go?
CARL
I ran into Nancy Buswell. Had lunch with her. She was down the hill, saw me walking, we drove out to the beach, had lunch. I’ve known her since high school, you know. She and I we go way back.. Her house gone too now I bet and we were eating lunch at the beach. That’s where we were.
BILLY
Who was it fiddling while Rome burned?
CARL
She looked good for twenty years gone. She liked what she saw, Bil. I just want you to know she liked what she saw.
HE SAYS THIS SADLY
BILLY
I’m glad she was looking, Carl. You deserve someone who is looking.

BEAT
CARL
I set the fire, Bil. I want you to know that. I set the fire and blew us all away.
( can’t believe it)—man we fight all the time and .man. And I dropped my cigarette and then., I ran into Nancy …. The whole thing in flames and nothing left at all. Nothing.
BILLY
What? Done? Like that?
CARL
The fire.. the guy on the freeway, all of it—it’s just signs and wonders, baby. Just fucking signs and wonders.
BILLY
Carl? What are you…?
CARL
I tried to love you, Billy, Every day for twenty years I tried so hard to love you but you never let me. You never gave me an inch, babe. And I turned the other cheek and turned the other cheek and took over more work at the office, and won another fucking award, and at some point, I mean… nowhere to run and nowhere to hide,
BILLY
Nobody needs to know about the fire. Nobody needs to know,
CARL
You begging me, Billy? You see the guy on his knees on the cement and you’re now willing to beg me, to tell me you love me,
BILLY
No, Carl. Not begging. Not begging at all.
CARL
I guess I should. go to Mexico or something.
BILLY
Mexico? They’ll love you there, Carl
CARL
So many people liked me. So many. Man I know people all around the world through the business and I bet there isn’t a one who doesn’t like me. But you, Billy. You were always the one who didn’t like me. Never let me rest, babe. Why’d you do that?
BILLY
I’m that guy on the freeway. Scraping my knees, looking for deliverance, the right route to your heart.. your authentic heart.
CARL
What the fuck does that mean? Authentic heart. Damn , girl. I’m just a simple guy and wanted a simple life. Nothing fancy. And I did my best. It may not have been enough for you but…
BIL
Of course, it was enough, I was just,, I couldn’t find you. You looked so great to everyone else but I couldn’t find you.

CARL
You were so goddamn busy looking at the road, scraping your knees and me, I was riding in a convertible to the beach. Maybe that’s the whole story right there.
BILLY MOVES BACK TO THE TABLE AND SITS.
BILLY
Here, sit. Eat your dinner, It’s cold. It’s good, you’ll see,
CARL KISSES HER ON THE FOREHEAD.
CARL
I’m outta here, babe. I’m on my way.
CARL LOOKS BACK AT HER AND THEN GOES TO THE DOOR WITH HIS BAG
BILLY
You burned it all up, Carl. Ashes to ashes.
.
CARL
Dust to dust. Yeah, dust to dust, babe.
CARL LEAVES
BILLY SITS AT THE SMALL TABLE, PICKS UP HER CUP OF NOODLES AND STARES STRAIGHT AHEAD

LIGHTS FADE.
END OF PLAY.